Ahrimen (Dan)

[Berserker]

Ahrimen the Unknown
(As you are reading this you have no idea who Ahrimen is. You know, the old guy, skeletor . . . . Fine, it's DAN, are you happy now)

Ahrimen the Unknown has the stats of a Wood Elf War Dancer (Fething Hippie)

Ahrimen the Unknown does not come equiped with armor as he does not wear any. (fething hippie !!)

Magic Items:
The Unicorn Circlet
Ahrimen the Unknown's first piece of armor was the Unicorn Circlet that rattled and entertained him as a child. However, as he grew into a man he refused to take the circlet off, and his head was forced to grow around it leaving an pecular horn-shaped growth in the center of his head. This has given him an extra thick skull, and has given him an unhealthy obsession with headbutting.

The Unicorn Circlet gives Ahrimen the Unknown a +1 wound, a + 4 Leadership, and a +2 Inititive. However, before the battle begins he must also roll a d6 to see if he is subject to Too Much Headbutting. On a roll of 6, he suffers Stupidity, until he can successfully roll against another Galatians Leadership. (over there, stupid)

Skeletor Helm
The Skeletor Helm, sometimes also called the angry gorilla, has been with Ahrimen the Unknown since he was in his teens. The Skeletor Helm has had to be rebuilt many times. However, the interior padding is still the original padding, and it is the padding that is full of magical mojo, not the actual helmet. There is no padding in the front of the helmet, as Ahrimen the Unknown prefers to use his nose as a buffer instead.

The Skeletor Helm makes Ahrimen the Unknown cause Fear and it gives him a 4+ ward save.

Flaming Sword of Ruin
This hidious monstrosity was so ugly and queer, Ahrimen the Unknown had to store it anywhere, but at his house. Ahrimen the Unknown felt it was cursed and left it behind after every battle. It also makes your hands black and sticky, ruining your gloves, gear bag, and your transports upolstery.

Any wound Ahrimen the Unknown suffers, he can chose to have the Flaming Sword of Ruin take instead. Then to show how tough he is, he must then wound himself, or let Tharius the Pink sit in his lap, until an equal number of wounds have been dealt to him, robbing his enemies of any Combat Resolution Bonuses.

Spiky Counch of Blowing
In Ahrimen the Unknown's Bag of Sneaky Trickery, Green Dice, and Wargghh, he keeps the Spiky Counch. It is an ancient relic, and most who have seen it are amazed it has lasted this long, let alone someone has lips big enough to fit over the blowhole.

During the Rally Phase have Ahrimen the Unknown take a Inititive test to see if he remembers that he actually has the horn. If he passes, immidiatly rally all broken units within 20".

Chaos Marks
Ahrimen the Unknown is covered in Chaos marks. His skin is a potted, ravaged landscape of bumps, bruises, warts, scars, pimples, tumors, and dry, itchy, discolored patches.

Slaanesh: Ahrimen the Unknown has obsenely large man-nipples, making him irresistable to the opposite sex. This gives him a 4+ Nipple-Tweeking save against archery should he be shot as he openly twists them and goads on the archers for another volley. Ahrimen the Unknown also must roll before the battle a d6 for the number of Ex-Girlfriend models that show up to the battle. Any wound Ahrimen the Unknown suffers from archery can be transferred to an Ex-Girlfriend model, as they are either swooning over him or he just picks them up and hold them in the way. Finally, Clayson can not join any unit Ahrimen the Unknown is with as Ahrimen the Unknown has "too many girlfriends"

Nurgle: Ahrimen the Unknown's sweat glands are the size of #2 pencil erasers. This give him a perpetual stink of garlic and swamp-ass. This also makes him irrestistable to women, but only the gods know why. Ahrimen the Unknown's greasy ofactory offending perspirations give life to inanimate clothing. Should Ahrimen the Unknown be killed in battle his gambison will fight on. (Its stats are 2's down the board) However, while Ahrimen the Unknown is alive the Nurglite Gambison gives him a +2 wounds, +1 attack, a + 1 WS, and +4 Italian Greaseball armor save in hand to hand combat as no one can stand to be that close to him without pinching their nose.

Tzeentch: Ahrimen the Unknown's body is actually building a miniture clone of itself, and though it looks like Ahrimen the Unknown is pregnant, it is actually growing in his sheild arm. The Clone gives Ahrimen the Unknown good ideas, like how to be a sneaky bastard. It is not unknown to see Ahrimen the Unknown walking backwards into the battle, convincing a enemy unit he is on their side, and then slaghtering the lot of them. This often allows Ahrimen the Unknown to strike first against all Generals, Heroes, and Champions.

Khorne: Over Ahrimen the Unknown's right kindey are two large scars resembeling the Pennsic War Horn. Apparently, he offered his left nut to blow the war horn, but the goblin chirurgeon grabbed something he could pawn for more on E-Bay. The War Horn Scar gives Ahrimen the Unknown a +2 Attacks, and a +2 WS, because its freaking cool. This Mark of Khorne also activates after Ahrimen the Unknown is first wounded, giving him Frenzy.

Special Abilities:
Do You Yield?
It is really less a question and more a statement, especially if your some punk-ass Northerner group.

If Ahrimen the Unknown charges a unit by himself, and that unit is otherwise unengaged except by Ahrimen the Unknown, they are given the chance to yield. If they choose to yield they immediately break, and Ahrimen the Unknown can not pursue. Should they stand their ground, Ahrimen the Unknown has the number of attacks equal to the number of troops in the unit. However, these attacks are at a -2 WS as he really has to block, dance, whirl, twist and spin more than usual.

Gladitorial Prowess
There are two things about challenging Ahrimen the Unknown you need to know. First, you can not win, and second, there is no safe place to stand (Sorry, Ivar). Ahrimen the Unknown is known to clobber indescrimnately, striking spectators, small woodland creatures, and even himself in the process. Remember, it is not about who killed who, but who got made to look like a punk-ass bitch.

If Ahrimen the Unknown or a fellow Galatian within 6" is challenged, Ahrimen the Unknown may accept the challenge, and distribute any number his attacks between the challenger and his unit. All Wounds Ahrimen the Unknown scores, count towards his combat resolution.

Old School
Ahrimen the Unknown is old-school Markland. Brought up in the home of hard knocks, and trained in a place called Gym Wars. Gym Shorts are now Ahrimen the Unknown's greatest battle, as they are all the way on the other side of the room, and he can not reach them without leaving the warmth of his bed.

Before the Battle begins, roll a d6 to see what affliction Ahrimen the Unknown is suffering from this week.
1- Fat Bastard
Ahrimen the Unknown is unbreakable and can't pursue....they never leave their food behind.
2- Pleading the Old
Ahrimen the Unknown can not be fielded unless you have taken at least 2 other Galatians
3- Injured and/or Sick
Halve one of Ahrimen the Unknown's Stats (M, WS, At ..etc). You can not halve his BS, as he would not notice the difference.
4- Gas Tax
Cheap bastard. Before the game begins, roll a die. The number on the die is the turn that Ahrimen the Unknown shows up.
5,6- Pissed off at girlfriend/ex-girlfriend
Ahrimen the Unknown has Frenzy and is Stubborn.