Tharius (Theresa)

[Berserker]

Tharius the Pink of the Wobbleknocker Tribe

Has the stats of an Amazon Priestess (WD 306 or 307 I think)

Magic Items:
Pennsic Bow
Found during one of the many Pennsic wars, this bow always seems to shoot straight even if Tharius is distracted by shiny objects or bumps the arrow with her enormous boobs. The bow always hits on a 2+ and counts as strength 4.

Supergirl Thong
Though not really a magic item, the Supergirl thong is a source of great inspiration and amusement to Galatians. They can stretch it and give Tharius a wedgy, they can stare at it, they can smack Tharius in the ass, it doesn't matter! Galatians love it! Galatians within 6" of Tharius may re-roll failed break and psychology tests.

Plastic Card of Eternal Credit Line
In the land of the Wobbleknockers there is no such thing as credit card debt. Your can charge and charge and charge with no repercussions what-so-ever! Well even though Tharius has left that land to live with the Galatians, she still has her Magic Credit Card! Before the battle begins the Galatians beg Tharius to get them a new armor part that they "absolutely need." If Tharius is included in the army, all Galatians gain +1 armor save

Special Rules
Myyyy.....Milksakes Bring All The Boys To The Party
There is just something about Tharius that just amazes and stupifies the opposite sex, but I just can't put my finger on it... In either case no enemy model may attack Tharius unless she attacks them first. She also has a 5+ distraction ward save.

Bright Shiny Objects
Oh! Look at that! Oh! And that! Isn't this pretty?! Ain't that cute?! Unless Tharius is near Ahriman the Unknown she will wonder randomly about the battlefield looking at the whatever catches her attention at that moment. If within 6" of Ahriman, Tharius is controlled as normal. However, if she is not, she will more 2d6" in a random direction. If this brings her in contact with an enemy unit, she will not engage them.

DEON!
I swear these two might as well be married. If Ahriman the Unknown and Tharius are in the same army Ahriman always counts as rolling a 6 on his "Old School" chart. This is not because he is always angry at Tharius, but also because she makes him perpetually horny. Also, if Bash or Boagrius are within 6" of Tharius, they suffer from -1 Leadership and Weapon Skill, but gain +1 Strength and Frenzy.