Mongo the Awkward Behemoth
Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 6:36 pm
Mongo the Awkward Behemoth
M WS BS S T W I A Ld
4…3...4..5 4.3.1.2.7
Fricking Huge-Ass Shield
“Is a barn somewhere missing a door?”
This thing is huge. When it rains, Galatia huddles beneath it. If left on the ground, Air Force jets land on it. You can not even imagine how heavy it is . . . OK, imagine a carrying a Hemi engine around the battlefield. That’s a start.
+2 armor save. However, Mongo can choose to use the shield offensively and gain an attack. However, when wielded in this way, he also loses the armor save.
Duct Tape Armor
“Loki, go help your boy. God help them both.”
Mongo has nice armor. Unfortunately it was built for normal sized human beings, not Shrek. Since the armor does not fit, it must be duct taped on ever time Mongo fights. Sadly, he still gets dressed faster than most Galatians. All the tape glue has made Mongo arms impervious to blows.
4+ armor save
Any time Mongo takes a wound, he also lose 1 point of armor save as a piece of his armor is likely to have fallen off.
Mongo and Mor Grendel may not be if in the same unit if playing a Mor Grendel’s house due to ancestral differences (over duct tape on his lawn).
Forgot How to Fight
“So you said he won a tourney last week right?
Yup, Kevin was so embarrassed he rubbed dog poop everywhere, just to get out of here.”
Before the battle roll a d6. If the result is a 1, Mongo loses a point of WS. If it is a 6, Mongo gains a point of WS. If it is a Markland battle, you may re-roll the first result.
From Wisconsin
“Frrmmpt!
Mongo, did you kill another chair?”
He’s big.
Mongo has a Unit Strength equal to his wounds.
6+ ward save
Encumbering Sword of Clubbing
“Jesus Mongo! Is this a pipe wraped in duct tape?”
Mongo always gets his pick at weapon, because no one else can wield the monstrosities he calls weapons. They are not just heavy; they are like pull your arm out of the socket heavy.
+2 Strength
Always strikes last. (May use with a shield)
Bull Rush
“Then I rode his ass into battle and Mongo bowled over so many guys that I didn’t have anyone to kill right away. I think he ejected someone into Pirate Camp.”
Mongo is a big dumb beast of burden, and we would mount his heifer ass but he would take our head off on the first low branch that came along.
Mongo causes Fear on the charge. However, if he fails to wound he is assumed to have tripped over his own feet, and can not get back up until his side wins combat (As his side will be using him as a living wall).
Hippity-Hoppity Attack
“Han-Han-Hee, Watch this.”
Mongo can’t fight. What he does should not be even construed as combat. Instead, he leaps around his opponents in an awkward dance that stuns and stupefies his attacker(s).
The Hippity-Hoppity Attack is taken in place of Mongo’s regular attacks. It is a single attack that auto hits, but is only S 3.
Mongo can not use the Hippity-Hoppity Attack on the charge.
Any unit beaten and broken by Mongo in the turn he used the Hippity-Hoppity Attack gains Stupidity. If used in a challenge, the opponent must make a Ld test at a minus 2 that if failed reduces the opponent to just one attack as well.
Fear of Trees
“I said I bet you can’t duct tape me IN a tree.”
Mongo will not enter woods, forests or jungles for fear of being duct taped to/in a tree.
Aaaaawww-kward
“Fritz, I really need your wood.”
At the end of a battle roll a d6. On a 6, the Galatians were unable to keep Mongo from saying something Aaaaawww-kward. Downgrade a victory one level (e.g. Major to Minor, Minor to Draw) or a defeat up one level as our peers can believe what they just heard. Either way the peers leave shaking their heads.
M WS BS S T W I A Ld
4…3...4..5 4.3.1.2.7
Fricking Huge-Ass Shield
“Is a barn somewhere missing a door?”
This thing is huge. When it rains, Galatia huddles beneath it. If left on the ground, Air Force jets land on it. You can not even imagine how heavy it is . . . OK, imagine a carrying a Hemi engine around the battlefield. That’s a start.
+2 armor save. However, Mongo can choose to use the shield offensively and gain an attack. However, when wielded in this way, he also loses the armor save.
Duct Tape Armor
“Loki, go help your boy. God help them both.”
Mongo has nice armor. Unfortunately it was built for normal sized human beings, not Shrek. Since the armor does not fit, it must be duct taped on ever time Mongo fights. Sadly, he still gets dressed faster than most Galatians. All the tape glue has made Mongo arms impervious to blows.
4+ armor save
Any time Mongo takes a wound, he also lose 1 point of armor save as a piece of his armor is likely to have fallen off.
Mongo and Mor Grendel may not be if in the same unit if playing a Mor Grendel’s house due to ancestral differences (over duct tape on his lawn).
Forgot How to Fight
“So you said he won a tourney last week right?
Yup, Kevin was so embarrassed he rubbed dog poop everywhere, just to get out of here.”
Before the battle roll a d6. If the result is a 1, Mongo loses a point of WS. If it is a 6, Mongo gains a point of WS. If it is a Markland battle, you may re-roll the first result.
From Wisconsin
“Frrmmpt!
Mongo, did you kill another chair?”
He’s big.
Mongo has a Unit Strength equal to his wounds.
6+ ward save
Encumbering Sword of Clubbing
“Jesus Mongo! Is this a pipe wraped in duct tape?”
Mongo always gets his pick at weapon, because no one else can wield the monstrosities he calls weapons. They are not just heavy; they are like pull your arm out of the socket heavy.
+2 Strength
Always strikes last. (May use with a shield)
Bull Rush
“Then I rode his ass into battle and Mongo bowled over so many guys that I didn’t have anyone to kill right away. I think he ejected someone into Pirate Camp.”
Mongo is a big dumb beast of burden, and we would mount his heifer ass but he would take our head off on the first low branch that came along.
Mongo causes Fear on the charge. However, if he fails to wound he is assumed to have tripped over his own feet, and can not get back up until his side wins combat (As his side will be using him as a living wall).
Hippity-Hoppity Attack
“Han-Han-Hee, Watch this.”
Mongo can’t fight. What he does should not be even construed as combat. Instead, he leaps around his opponents in an awkward dance that stuns and stupefies his attacker(s).
The Hippity-Hoppity Attack is taken in place of Mongo’s regular attacks. It is a single attack that auto hits, but is only S 3.
Mongo can not use the Hippity-Hoppity Attack on the charge.
Any unit beaten and broken by Mongo in the turn he used the Hippity-Hoppity Attack gains Stupidity. If used in a challenge, the opponent must make a Ld test at a minus 2 that if failed reduces the opponent to just one attack as well.
Fear of Trees
“I said I bet you can’t duct tape me IN a tree.”
Mongo will not enter woods, forests or jungles for fear of being duct taped to/in a tree.
Aaaaawww-kward
“Fritz, I really need your wood.”
At the end of a battle roll a d6. On a 6, the Galatians were unable to keep Mongo from saying something Aaaaawww-kward. Downgrade a victory one level (e.g. Major to Minor, Minor to Draw) or a defeat up one level as our peers can believe what they just heard. Either way the peers leave shaking their heads.
cant go to practice but you can knock me in the mellon? :P